Thursday, January 24, 2013

Meet Jane Evans


Jane Evans is divorced. It wasn’t fast, nor exactly by her choosing, but it was probably necessary.  The decision to get married wasn’t irrational or short-sided.  She wasn’t too young and the chapel was shotgun free.  She wasn’t then, nor is she now, a bad judge of character.  She’s quite the opposite actually.  And she has never been quick to get into relationships, though she’s long to stay in them. It’s probably why she fought to stay married well beyond the shifting priorities of her then husband, well beyond a point that made personal or emotional sense, and way the hell past the point of financially viable.  For better or worse, it defines her current perceptions of herself and those around her, and she’ll admit as much to those trusting enough to hear it.  In her early thirties, she is still young and capable of starting a family.  But a date-book full of competing priorities, both personal and professional, and the financial and emotional repercussions of her divorce, have delayed any permanent decisions regarding the long-term until now.  She is in an essence at a crossroads and getting to this point hasn’t been easy. 

Divorces are expensive, and Jane has several years worth of credit card debt to prove it.  Those who don’t know her might say she is bad with money. But her financial troubles are unique in that they arise from truly selfless endeavors.  She has a strong desire to please those for which she deeply cares, which leads to untenable situations where others are inclined to take advantage of her and she inclined to let them out of genuine love and affection. Her ex-husband didn’t take advantage of her financially, but the situation did.

A working professional with a college degree living in Washington D.C., Jane’s debt necessitated a second job in the service industry. Right after her divorce, she took jobs that gave her emotional security versus financial security, sacrificing higher pay for lower stress roles that she enjoyed.  Working below her skill set and pay grade caused her to stay in the service industry longer than she would have liked it, consuming all the additional emotional value of the primary job.  But within the last year she has become an assistant for a top-level executive at a Fortune 50 company.  Her boss complements her thoroughness and attention to detail, and Jane feels as if she may have finally found a career path she can commit to with a company she loves.  Most importantly, the pay is enough to where she doesn’t have to work two jobs.  It allows her to spend more time with her friends.

Above all else, she values family and friends.  It’s why she hasn’t yet re-married, as the strength of the relationships she has with those she cares for most is enough.  These relationships - emotional, built on trust and loyalty - are not formed quickly, but are durable and enduring.  Her friends view her as “fiercely loyal” and wise.  She is more often than not the conscience of those around her and a go to source for personal and professional advice, from people that should or should not be dated to proofreading work emails.  She is also commonly tasked with intervening on the behalf of her group of friends whenever an individual has veered dangerously off a professional or personal path.  She is a light drinker, so naturally more prone to make better decisions than those around her. 

Because Jane places her set of friends in such high regard, she goes out of her way to please them.  Unfortunately it eats into a lot of her free time and she struggles to keep up.  Her desire to keep pace is a large reason for her recent affixation with technology, especially applications or platforms that allow her to efficiently stay up to date with her friends. 

Outsiders may label her particular group as affluent - some might even call them “scenesters.”  Though Jane’s social scene fits well into stereotypes, and there are certainly some within it fighting for grandiose awareness, she is not one of them, and not interested in being the center of anyone’s attention.   Some would call Jane and her friends “spoiled”, but she knows the high character of those she confides in, as they otherwise wouldn’t be her friends.  She is also aware that, despite any troubles she may have, she certainly has it better than most and is grateful as a result.

If you were to meet her out (and she’s out frequently to keep pace) you’d find she has a very classic look.  She is often complemented on her fashion choices, though she personally doesn’t think she has any style at all.  She wears what feels right, and considers herself a creature of habit when it comes to wardrobe.  She has the same nail polish day in and day out and always, without fail, a pearl necklace given to her by her aunt and pearl earrings (from an ex boyfriend oddly enough). 

You might remark how polite and inviting she comes off as.  Warm even.  The conversation will probably begin with pop-culture before becoming more personal, though it would never become political.  You might go so far as to say she is an extrovert, though she would disagree with you.  Unless you had her one-on-one, where she is down right chatty.

Today she finds herself in a good place. She has a position with a company that she can potentially turn into a career and is in a relationship she would like to see turn into marriage. But past experience has taught her to worry.  He has demonstrated a deep seeded fear of commitment and Jane is concerned she may be once again wasting her very precious time.  Further frustrating her are the basic challenges of life that seem to come in successive waves, such as a flat tire, followed by a $1,000 vet bill for her cat Emma, on top of a good friend deciding to have her wedding in Dubai.  International plane flights are expensive when you are trying to get out of debt.  Though these obstacles irritate Jane, she understands the superficial nature of them, “Big city problems of big city life.”  She worries that these somewhat mundane obstacles might deter her motivation, as there are so many things she want to do (travel the world, learn to cook) and increasingly less time to do them.  She desperately would like to continue along the positive path she has recently found, as she is excited about the potential that her current situation is much more than just a place, and actually a destination.